Wednesday, March 24, 2010

The Achilles Heel of My Serial Dating - Lewis

Lewis was different from all the other hook ups. Of course, there's always one good apple that spoils the bunch.

In my quest to meet lots and lots of men, I do random Facebook add rampages. I was up late one night stressing over travel arrangements for a conference in DC the next day. I had a 6am flight, so why wouldn't I pick this late night to add a shitload of men on Facebook?

I went to Lynn's page, because she has thousands of friends and lots of them are men. Of course.
I saw cute guys and interesting guys and guys that were aight ... and then I saw Lewis. I sent a friend request and immediately texted Lynn. "Who is Lewis?" In the meantime, he 'liked' my profile pic. Contact! Lynn actually knew him and apparently he was awesome.

After exchanging a few texts with Lynn, I convinced myself to send him a private message and ask him out. As bold as I am, the idea of hitting someone (I had never met) up for a date on FB was intimidating as hell. I was terrified that he would think I was strange, but with shaky hands, I typed the following message and pressed send.

"Want to meet for a drink sometime?"

He responded pretty quickly with a casual "Meeting would be cool." I let him know I would be out of town for a few days and sent my number. He did the same. I went to DC and didn't hear from him.

A week after I got back, Lynn hit me up and said she was going to an art show at which Lewis was showing some work (oh, of course he's an artist). She asked if I wanted to roll with her and go for drinks after. We already had plans to watch True Blood in the evening, so I figured I would go. When we got to the show, I was relieved to find out that Lewis was not there yet. We browsed the work. Some of the art was ... bad. Then, there was Lewis' work. Of course, it was not bad. It was actually good. This dude was killin' it without even showing up. I realized I was playing him up too much. Lynn asked if I wanted to stick around to meet him, but I had enjoyed my time with his work and it was time to drink and watch vampires have sex, so we left.

Lewis and I exchanged texts about his work and possibly hanging out that night, but I had a few beers and by the time the vampires were done handlin' up, I was too tired to meet anyone.

A few nights later, Lewis made a brilliant joke via text and it lead to an all night video chat, which led to the introduction of one of my new favorite recurring characters. Soon after the video chat, we met. He drove across town to get me one night. We went back to his place, watched Black Dynamite and had sex.

The dates to follow would include:
~ Walking around downtown at night, taking photos and having sex in the back of his car. (This one will require its own post.)
~ Going to a random scrap/salvage yard and taking photos, then hitting a grocery store and going back to his place, where we had sex.
~ Hanging out at his place while he worked and then having sex. (This was my favorite.)
The next last minute adventure with this dude is yet to be seen... I am just shocked that he actually turned out to be as cool as I had hoped. (For now.) Many a time, I have gotten my hopes up over a lame. It's a sad story. This is not a sad story.

Ladies and gents, I introduce you to the Achilles Heel of my Serial Dating ... Lewis.

Train Guy

8 months out of the year, I live in the lesbian capitol of the country. I don't see many men, much less get to have sex with any. 8 months out of the year, I don't have sex with men. (Draw conclusions where you may.) So, I generally hit the ground running when I get away.

Upon returning home for the summer, I took a 2 day train trip from Springfield, MA to DC, back up through upstate New York and Ohio and to Chicago. The train stopped in Chicago and there was a 5 hour layover.

I was standing in line at Union Station in Chicago when I heard it. Normally it would have made me cringe a little, but it was like butter after so long. It was a man with a Texas accent. Not just Texas... I always loved that, but it was Dallas. I love that less. It's the accent that makes a man say "hurr" instead of "hair." It wasn't pretty, but it was comforting. I struck up a conversation immediately.

We talked for a bit in line to board the train. We experienced a short delay in boarding when the young man in front of us dropped two of his five pieces of fried chicken on the floor of Union Station and proceeded to debate throwing away or keeping the chicken. I think we all know what the outcome of that internal debate was. He was a big boy. The floor chicken became the joke of the day. Big Boy would have to deal with us for the remainder of the trip.

The rest of the trip played out just as you would expect. We sat together once we boarded the train to avoid risking a seat mate that was less appealing. We cracked jokes and ate our meals together. Train Guy was of less than average intelligence. He was simple, but funny and cute. Oh ... he's a minor league ball player too. His body was right. His arm brushed mine the whole trip, until I got cold and he offered to put it around me. I let him and the progression of the rest of the evening felt pretty natural. Really natural by the end of the night.

When the lights went out, we kissed and the heavy petting began. I had happened to grab a condom before leaving home and Train Guy and I used it that night in the dressing room in the lower level of the last train of the Texas Eagle line of Amtrak. Yep folks. I had sex on a train. And it was good sex. I was amazed. I expected it to tide me over until something ... idunno ... in a bed or at least in a house, but I never expected it to be good.

It's funny how good sex can fuck you up for a lil while. I gave this dude my number. I let him snuggle up to me in our adjoining seats. And he gave me a shirt so I could keep warm on the painfully cold train. The sex was so good I kept the shirt. I thought I might love him. Then I awoke the next morning and remembered that good sex can't make a man smart. I got off the train in Longview, TX and caught a bus to Houston. I thought about him (and when I say him I mean the sex) a little on the bus, but mostly I just slept. Lynn got me at the station and we began the celebration that would be the last summer of our 20's, Viva Summer 2010.

A few weeks later, a baseball game brought Train Guy to Houston and we had sex in his hotel room. It was life changing. Possibly the best sex I have had, but still not enough to make me take him up on his offer of something more between us. As we ate our continental breakfast and I waited for him to drive me home, the high from the sex wore off again and the Dallas came back into sight. I was ready to de-board Train Guy for the last time.

*Foot Note - We got busted leaving the dressing room after having the great sex on the train by an Amish woman and her two Amish teenage daughters. No joke. The train was full of Amish folks.

About Me

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I am the product-child of the Women's Lib movement. I have a grade A education, a promising career and no immediate goal for children or a spouse. I will be 30 this year and I have spent many years in monogamous relationships. In and out of 1 to 2 year relationships, I always dated with the goal of meeting someone special. Most of the time I didn't date. Most of the time I found myself falling into relationship after relationship. These relationships were doomed to fail. They were all built on expectations that were, for me, unattainable. I love meeting new people. I find sex enjoyable and empowering and I am not happy when I am monogamous. So, after my last break-up, after taking some time to grieve, I decided to cut my societal puppet strings and get back in the game. I set out on a mission to spend the Summer of 2010 dating as many men as possible. My only initial criteria was attraction. My only limitation was - no love and no structured relationships. This is my date by date tale of what life can be like outside of the goals of relationships and love.