Thursday, August 4, 2011

Fairy Tales

So, I am watching this show about romance. It's supposed to be a romantic comedy, but it's actually just awful.  She's a Chinese American with sweat shop parents and a drug addict brother. But, she's different. She went to a good school and she has a good career. One night, she's at a mixer with a bunch of wealthy people. Then, of course, she meets a nice rich man. He doesn't know she's from a poor family. He mistakes her for a rich Chinese woman and he falls for her, because his mistake led him to give her a chance.

Okay, this is the same fairy tale story we have gotten forever, right? The rich man mistakes the poor girl for a wealthy one, falls in love, finds out who she really is, doesn't care and they live happily ever after. That's fine. It's whatever. My issue is not with the fucked up social aspects or the hypocrisy of it all. I am not going to talk about the unpalatable nature of the Cinderella story, or the fact that she actually mentions that she was named after a Chinese Cinderella.

I don't have a problem with any of that. At least, not today. Today, my issue is with the kiss. There was tongue. The kiss in this movie was the only thing believable. She pulled at the back of his hair. He grabbed her head. I was surprised. And it definitely removed me from the fairy tale setting the movie worked so hard to create.

They worked, as in all fairy tales, to keep her innocent. They worked to keep the whole relationship innocent. 'Innocent' being free and devoid of sex. But that kiss... that kiss just threw it all off for me. They had passion. And at that moment, I relived all of my passionate kisses. I could feel the lips of past lovers... or kissers. And, I remember the physical things that happen to me when I am kissed passionately.

When I am kissed passionately, my whole body heats. My face gets flush and I get a little light headed. My muscles tighten, then soften. A gravity comes over me that pulls my whole body toward my kisser. My breath speeds up and my heart races. Along with everything else heating up, my legs fall in line. Then, while our mouths are intertwined and wet with saliva, I become wet ... elsewhere. And, sex floods my mind.

Wait a second. Hold up ... Did Cinderella get wet when Prince Charming kissed her? Was she thinking about sex? Did Prince Charming put his tongue in her mouth? And if so, how did they keep sex out of the equation? It's all been good in theory. I mean, it's all a fucking lie. But, the last thing I had even dreamed was that Cinderella was wet and writhing for her Prince. I guess I knew all along that it was a sham, but her vagina?

How dare they lie to me about Cinderella's vagina? This is why I always felt so 'over-sexed' when I got wet from my very first kiss on. I felt like my sexual urges were in direct conflict with my 'innocence.' Oh well, I was fooled. I suppose if I had thought longer and harder about it, I would have realized that Prince Charming had a serious foot fetish. And, as soon as he found his Cinderella and got up close to that foot, he swept her up, married her and got to that wedding night. He probably had his hand up her dress as they were waving at us and riding off in the carriage.

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About Me

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I am the product-child of the Women's Lib movement. I have a grade A education, a promising career and no immediate goal for children or a spouse. I will be 30 this year and I have spent many years in monogamous relationships. In and out of 1 to 2 year relationships, I always dated with the goal of meeting someone special. Most of the time I didn't date. Most of the time I found myself falling into relationship after relationship. These relationships were doomed to fail. They were all built on expectations that were, for me, unattainable. I love meeting new people. I find sex enjoyable and empowering and I am not happy when I am monogamous. So, after my last break-up, after taking some time to grieve, I decided to cut my societal puppet strings and get back in the game. I set out on a mission to spend the Summer of 2010 dating as many men as possible. My only initial criteria was attraction. My only limitation was - no love and no structured relationships. This is my date by date tale of what life can be like outside of the goals of relationships and love.
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