Friday, April 29, 2011

Congress Of The Cow

It's not what you think. But, it's serious. I've been getting dry during doggy style sex. I tried to find alternate names for it. 'Doggy style' isn't my favorite term, but referring to it by it's Latin, 'Coitus a tergo' seemed a little much. And, I feel like 'rear entry' could also refer to butt sex and that is not what I'm talking about. Also, the Kama Sutra describes it as "the congress of a cow." Not a chance in fucking hell I'm calling it the congress of the cow. So, for the purpose of this post, I am stuck using the colloquial 'doggy style,' because upon further research, it was on the less-offensive side. Go figure.

Anyway, this evening I was sitting with my friends, Leslie and Sandy, and we were doing the kinds of things we usually do. They were studying and writing papers and I was working on a website I'm making for a project.  (Shameless art plug ... here.) So, we were studying and browsing/sharing porn. And, I noticed something in an amateur video and it brought a question to mind. (Yes, I enjoy amateur porn these days. But it has to be done right. Sometimes you have to wade through the ocean of ass fisting and pregnant Czech chicks to find good ones, but, trust me, they are there. And if you haven't lost your appetite by the time you find a good one, it can be very nice.)

Back to what I was saying, I was perusing the amateur section of one of the new porn sites I found and during a lovely shared personal moment, I noticed that the couple stopped because she had gotten dry a minute after they switched to doggy style. This brought to mind my problem.  Doggy style is my favorite position, when done right. I really enjoy it. So, pleasure is not the problem. I like it and it feels good, but about five minutes in, I turn to the fucking Sahara. It's not okay. This doesn't happen to me.

Sure, I have the occasional dryness, but it's never a problem. It happens when I'm not feeling a guy, when he's not putting in the work I am. It happens when I have a lot on my mind or I get sidetracked or distracted. It happens at the normal times and it doesn't happen often. Normally, I am wet as soon as they kiss my neck or touch me anywhere.  It takes a little extra touching if I've just been waken up, but if I'm feelin it, it happens like clockwork. I am pretty down for whatever whenever.

But, when it comes to doggy style, I get dry.  I tried Googling it and wasn't really sure what keywords to use. The search didn't yield any helpful information. I've never addressed the subject with any friends, because it's never come up. But, I need some input here. What the hell?

There is some physical reason why I get dry when in that position. I really believe it's beyond a mental block. It happens quicker if I am face down, ass up. There's something about the inversion of the pelvis. I know that when one is on her period, and she inverts her pelvis (dancing, pilates or yoga) it actually shuts down her menstruation. Is inversion or the position of all fours making me dry? If I am flat on my stomach, it doesn't happen, and as soon as I am out of the all fours position, I am flowing like normal.

No other position does this, and it's become an ongoing mystery to me. It doesn't happen every time, but it happens often enough that I would call it a trend. And, so I'm curious if anyone else has this issue. I'm really not feelin it and I'm not sure that there is anything I can do to change it.  But, you better believe I will be paying close attention when it does and doesn't happen and I will be adjusting my actions accordingly. Now, I just need someone to practice/experiment with. What do you say? Anyone down for a little congress of the cow?


  1. um ditto here. Thought it was the ceiling fan but NOPE when you discover it...please share

  2. same here! i can't blame the boyfriend, because he's good at what he does. BUT after a while in being in that position, astroglide becomes a friend, but i would rather prefer my own personal lube. my question is... do you go dry instantly right when you get on all fours? or after a few minutes? if so, then i will assume it's normal. this needs some intense research. :)


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I am the product-child of the Women's Lib movement. I have a grade A education, a promising career and no immediate goal for children or a spouse. I will be 30 this year and I have spent many years in monogamous relationships. In and out of 1 to 2 year relationships, I always dated with the goal of meeting someone special. Most of the time I didn't date. Most of the time I found myself falling into relationship after relationship. These relationships were doomed to fail. They were all built on expectations that were, for me, unattainable. I love meeting new people. I find sex enjoyable and empowering and I am not happy when I am monogamous. So, after my last break-up, after taking some time to grieve, I decided to cut my societal puppet strings and get back in the game. I set out on a mission to spend the Summer of 2010 dating as many men as possible. My only initial criteria was attraction. My only limitation was - no love and no structured relationships. This is my date by date tale of what life can be like outside of the goals of relationships and love.