Sunday, December 12, 2010


This was prompted by a discussion with my friends.  It was an off-the-cuff post for my female readers.  Just go with it...

I love my breasts, but it took a while to get there.  I used to hate them.  I thought they weren't perky enough.  I thought my nipples were a strange color, then I thought they might be too big.  I thought they were too big at times.  I didn't like the way they always had tan lines.  But, when I decided to go to a tanning bed to tan them, I didn't like the color they turned.  They were either too small, too big, too white or too tan.

They hurt at different times of the month.  I hate for them to touch each other.  They sweat and feel bound when in a sports bra and they fall into my face when I do the corkscrew in Pilates.  Their weight make running more difficult and they put strain on my back.  I get embarrassed when I am in a conversation and I realize my nipples are hard.  I try to shield them when a cold breeze blows.

I hear a lot of women speak of their breasts with shame or disdain.  If they are too big, they hate them for that.  If they are too small, they wish or make them bigger.  They complain of stretch marks and of stray hairs.  They hate that they have small, large, protruding or pale nipples.

Breasts swell and retain water.  They cause pain and discomfort.  But, they also bring me extreme pleasure.  I have a new found love for my breasts.  The love started a long time ago, but now it is in full bloom.  I have sensitive nipples, so my love for the sensations they brought started with my sex life.  My breasts are an integral part of my sex life and my sexual pleasure.  

But now, I love their appearance.  They are full and the perfect shade of brown.  I don't know how I ever thought they were saggy, unless time has worked backward.  I think I must have thought that the natural weight of breasts was the same as sag.  It isn't.  Real, natural breasts fall, they hang.  This doesn't mean that they aren't round.  But they are soft and they yield to the touch.

Bras are uncomfortable.  I escape mine as soon as I am given the chance.  I, like most women can remove a bra without removing any other article of clothing.  It can be unfastened and slipped out of my sleeve before I have even slipped a shoe off.  I love the way my breasts look right after I take my bra off.  My nipples are happy to be free and become visible through whatever shirt I am wearing.  The flesh fills with chill bumps and the indentions left from the straps feel freed against my shirt, sheet or pillow.

So, with all the love I have for my breasts, I am not amazed when women express disdain or dislike for their breasts.  But, I always want to say, just give them time.  I always want to suggest honoring them and realizing what you like about them.  I understand if they are causing physical pain.  Sometimes they can put a damper on a pain free back.  But, breasts all look different.  And they are beautiful in all their different forms.  So, if you haven't already, get to know your breasts.  Stop hiding them away or feeling shame.  Whether they are big, small, round or saggy, pale or dark, they are yours and no one else's are any better.  Breasts are in a category with a lot of life's ups and downs.  Like love, food, laughter and sex, breasts bring life, comfort, pleasure and pain.  But, in the end, they are one of life's gifts to women ... not one of it's curses.

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About Me

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I am the product-child of the Women's Lib movement. I have a grade A education, a promising career and no immediate goal for children or a spouse. I will be 30 this year and I have spent many years in monogamous relationships. In and out of 1 to 2 year relationships, I always dated with the goal of meeting someone special. Most of the time I didn't date. Most of the time I found myself falling into relationship after relationship. These relationships were doomed to fail. They were all built on expectations that were, for me, unattainable. I love meeting new people. I find sex enjoyable and empowering and I am not happy when I am monogamous. So, after my last break-up, after taking some time to grieve, I decided to cut my societal puppet strings and get back in the game. I set out on a mission to spend the Summer of 2010 dating as many men as possible. My only initial criteria was attraction. My only limitation was - no love and no structured relationships. This is my date by date tale of what life can be like outside of the goals of relationships and love.
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