Sunday, July 25, 2010

Inbox

This is a compilation of messages in my online dating inbox. Enjoy.

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Holla,

Major props on the hair, seriously. It's the hair cut of the gods. I've had that cut for like, god damn, 9 years now at least. Hair is for pussies. I think we'd get along just grand. When should we start making mistakes? Perhaps I've made one (or more) already.

C'est la vie.

Hair is for pussies?

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It's been raining....

Here in Houston for days, Here is a little something to brighten your day (This track is lovely)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5iiAyon6YPI

Hope your well, I look forward to hearing back from you. By the way. What part of Houston do you live in?

The message not so bad. The music, however ....

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One time I brought the funny

But everyone used it as chip dip when it was clearly a dessert topping. Now I'm a completely serious and somber person.

Your guess is as good as mine.

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nice

This is simple and to the point, but I am not sure how to respond to this one.

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Hi there...

Hi there. I'm $@#^.

I just found your profile and wanted to write to say hello and see if we could chat. But there's a little confusion... are you up north now, or just visiting Houston for the summer?

I'll be up front and explain that I'm not necessarily looking for a full relationship kind of thing. I'm just kind of looking for someone cool to get to know and hang with, and then see where it leads.

But what are your thoughts about age? Something you are open minded about? Is it just a number, or just a state of mind? Do you like guys that are older than you? Can you be cool hanging out with a guy who's a little older and more mature?

Well, check out my profile, and I hope to hear back from you.

Wonder if he's older than me....?

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Did you go to Northeastern?

I didn't but I'd like to know because you seem legit.

Legit people only go to Northeastern.

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(No subject)

Are you really attending a college in New England? The reason I ask is because that's where I'm from.

I didn't respond.

The next day, I got this from the same guy ...

(No subject)

Hey...sorry my email wasn't hilarious. Thought I'd say hi based on a commonality. But maybe that part of your profile was supposed to be funny. Who knows..

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(No Subject)

Hi Hoe. How are you?

Did he just call me a hoe?

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About Me

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I am the product-child of the Women's Lib movement. I have a grade A education, a promising career and no immediate goal for children or a spouse. I will be 30 this year and I have spent many years in monogamous relationships. In and out of 1 to 2 year relationships, I always dated with the goal of meeting someone special. Most of the time I didn't date. Most of the time I found myself falling into relationship after relationship. These relationships were doomed to fail. They were all built on expectations that were, for me, unattainable. I love meeting new people. I find sex enjoyable and empowering and I am not happy when I am monogamous. So, after my last break-up, after taking some time to grieve, I decided to cut my societal puppet strings and get back in the game. I set out on a mission to spend the Summer of 2010 dating as many men as possible. My only initial criteria was attraction. My only limitation was - no love and no structured relationships. This is my date by date tale of what life can be like outside of the goals of relationships and love.
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