Tuesday, July 27, 2010

The Sacrificial Ego

Yesterday, Lisa called it... "So, you are in an interesting cycle. The guys hit you up, because they want to get a write-up. You get play and material and they get an ego boost." The trouble is, they don't always get that boost they are looking for. The Lover didn't get the most favorable review. He just never acknowledge reading his post, but he did ask me on a third date. Maybe he didn't read it. Lewis doesn't always read in a timely manner, so he gets info a few days late. The Beautiful One is always on it. He is one of my biggest fans. Why wouldn't he be? He gets glowing reviews. He earned them. He has even come up with new ideas, things for us to do in the future. He really likes to read about my experiences, not only with him, but with others. I think he likes that he can hit me up for more details after he reads. I don't give away identities. Never that.

This started as a way for me to share the hilarious and not-so-hilarious stories with all of you. My friends suggested that I chronicle my experiences, while also giving them an outlet to share their stories. So, after much encouragement from my friends and a post-coital conversation with The Beautiful One, My Life as a Serial Dater was born.

My point is, this has taken on a life of its own. It's gone from a simple chronicling of my experiences, to a catalyst for new experiences. It's no longer just an observation on dating. In order to be totally honest and keep it all respectful, I tell the men I date about the site. It has yet to be the cause of a date, but I am fairly sure it has been the cause of better sex. I think men are going above and beyond in hopes of reading a glowing review the next day.

So, I decided to take it to the next level. I have posted the link to this site to my online dating profiles. I have no expectations for responses. I just want to see what might happen. I posted the link last night. There was a message in my inbox this morning. It's pretty simple and pretty much what I expected: "If we go out, are you going to write about me?"

I just might, sir. But you should know I don't sleep with nearly all the men I date and if I do, I won't promise you will like your review. This site isn't about the men. It's about me. So, the egos have to take a backseat to my story. Happy reading.

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About Me

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I am the product-child of the Women's Lib movement. I have a grade A education, a promising career and no immediate goal for children or a spouse. I will be 30 this year and I have spent many years in monogamous relationships. In and out of 1 to 2 year relationships, I always dated with the goal of meeting someone special. Most of the time I didn't date. Most of the time I found myself falling into relationship after relationship. These relationships were doomed to fail. They were all built on expectations that were, for me, unattainable. I love meeting new people. I find sex enjoyable and empowering and I am not happy when I am monogamous. So, after my last break-up, after taking some time to grieve, I decided to cut my societal puppet strings and get back in the game. I set out on a mission to spend the Summer of 2010 dating as many men as possible. My only initial criteria was attraction. My only limitation was - no love and no structured relationships. This is my date by date tale of what life can be like outside of the goals of relationships and love.
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